Daemon Grotto

Hola all,
Firstly - thank you TC119 for helping my derpy soul with the registration - but also for the ebook you took the effort to publish: I found it very validating in many ways re my own experiences, and there were some useful bits of info in there too.

My experience began in the tale-end of the pandemic, in 2021. I had long been distantly involved with a woman I had met in Peru whilst on an ayahuasca retreat, someone I had had an intense, and mutal connection with. On my return to the UK, we eventually hooked up again online (and then the fun really began). The From 2015 to 2020 when the situation finally collapsed, amid great pain and heartbreak - I experienced so many phenomena through my inner connection with this person, that it the experience stood out far beyond any mere "boy meets girl" scenario. Intense empathy - at a distance of 1000s of miles, energy downloads, dreamsheightened senses, even some UFO activity. To this day, I have no real or complete way of describing or explaining our connection, unless it was "simply" mother ayahuasca setting me up for an intense ride, just for the hell of it. I had tried for a while to fit it into the category of a 'Twin Flame' relationship, but that community quickly proved to be too close minded, with its own dogma, so much so that that phrase lost its usefulness. Never, ever get involved with someone else, if they are already occupied with another relationship. The contact was on/off. I got used like a useful emotional doormat so many times, but the final actions that ripped her away from my trust, love and respect shut the door forever on something that had truly felt eternal. Its hard to describe that sort of thing in hindsight, it feels like insanity now, knowing her as I now do. But, eventually, I began to heal.

By the summer of 2021 (I think?) I had been getting more and more into the occult. Damien Echols was the person I had disscovered first, and I had quickly gotten past the deep layer of fluff and nonsense that exists out there and moved on to other teachers and different systems. The subject of Lilith presented a very interesting direction for me, I began a deep dive trying to delve through her history, to find the root of all the sources: I didnt - and still dont - trust the Judaic sources to be very well balanced. I know a lot of folk tend to latch onto them without realising some of the most quoted stuff is metaphorical or satire aimed at the culture of the times (Ben Sira for example, which is hardly even ancient). Nope: my intention was to find any information relating to PURE sexuality (something seemingly reviled along with Lilith), and I gravitated heavily towards tales of Astarte and Innana, even Isis: I sought the Sacred Prostitute.

Eventually, I came to realise, that if it had been possible for me to have such a sensual and powerful connection with another human, at a distance, then engaging with a spirit or succubus really wasnt out of the realms of the experiences Id already had. I cant remember all of the actions I took, but I know that several things where key at the time, in hindsight: my pure and intense INTENTION to discover that aspect of Goddess that embodied sacred sexuality, abstinence from all masturbation and porn (dont know how it managed that back then!), also - I ended up using Lilith's enn on a daily basis, too.

What began to happen, at first while lying in bed - was feeling energy begin to swirl around my genitalia. Often it would toy with my prostate. Things rapidly intensified. I would feel tingling start from my feet up. My whole body would soon be engulfed in sensation. In a trance like state, I would be presented with brief and enticing glimpses and suggestions of erotic images and ideas. I would experience dry orgasm after dry orgasm. Intitially, these things would only happen at night but soon they would occur in the daytime too. I could be sitting down doing something, and begin to feel the familiar sensation in my groin (the energy signature of it soon became very recognisible), and I would simply say internally "ok fuck it, lets go"... and I would retire to my bed to let the experience commence completely. This went on every day for over 2 months.

Theres another element to this experience, that in hindsight I would say was its climax... but thats enough of an introduction for now!

Hello,
That last paragraph sounds rather intense. As long as you're comfortable with it, I think it's fine.
I never thought of comparing a spirit lover to a long-distance relationship. I guess it kind of fits, but not really.
The first stages of contact with your succubus may be similar. You know she's there, but besides occasional little interactions, you just keep believing and calling out to her.

Hello and welcome Essence,

You touched on a lot of very interesting topics-it is quite a rabbit hole to go down when trying to figure it all out and seems to go on forever. I have gotten to the UFO part myself, after starting off Christian then going occult then realizing reality was larger than both which were plagued with inconsistencies and lies. I think I arrived where I now am due in part to the “known data” in this space: Entities and biologics that have been either authentically filmed or interacted with by various nations on a daily basis. Most reputable interaction I am referencing is via the US Navy and CIA-since declassified as well as whistleblower testimony before congress here in the states. Additionally after doing meditations with intention on some form of ET contact I have noticed I later see spheres and anomalies in the sky that are very apparent and even disturbing to those around me when I point them out. The sense that we can’t be alone out of trillions and trillions of planets and what does that mean in the scene of religions, beliefs, the occult and so on.


I asked my succubus “K” about this and felt a response that she is “inter-dimensional” and somehow falls into this world but at a level not many can sense and nearly all can’t see (myself included btw). I also felt the response that UFO or ET isn’t something too strange and that I shouldn’t consider it unreasonable.

Intention is such a powerful aspect of interaction-it touches on manifestation and frankly ties in with the phrase “careful what you wish for” and “never say never.” Words-representative of our thoughts and feelings are so powerful and reality shifting that the Abrahamic religions of the world really should be ashamed of their teachings which hinges on a central figure outside of one’s self-effectively taking the power away from people by misinformation and distraction. Quantum physics and specifically quantum entanglement as well as the particle slat test, which shows how particles are in light form until observed, really brings to the forefront how particulate matter is somehow conscious of being observed…this being part of intent to manifest then has a sense of validation in that what we want might be know by the wanted or be attracted to the intention. The thought being we create a requirement or vacuum that pulls what we want to us-like pushing down on the mattress to move a ball into the dip so to spread. Quantum entanglement comes into the picture then with our thought patterns on a biological level being linked to our “greater than physical matter” energy field / soul / aura which is part of the everlasting divine as a drop of water is to the ocean. So we pull towards ourselves and into our reality things we want with simple intentions.

K has been my teacher here and so far I have manifested small things here and there with a sort of crazy precision that has baffled my Christian family and friends, who know I don’t pray or worship their “dude.”

Lastly, I really enjoyed what you wrote: your command of the language is beyond mine as a US citizen and so much better than much of what I read online. Very refreshing, thank you and again welcome.

Thanks Riddle!

In your describing quantum 'stuff' - you really sum up very adequately I think magick in general very well there tbh.

My life has had a LOT of high strangeness in it in all fairness - Ive had a great deal of powerful experiences, not as full blown as some ET experiencers, granted. You can keep the face-to-face encounters with the lil guys though (no thankyou!). Im surprised I havnt met them in all honesty, because Ive had UFO sightings ongoing throughout most of my life - Ive always felt a sort of kinship - at times Ive seen craft respond directly to me paying attention to them. My closest ever encounter saw me almost directly beneath a craft that was silent and slowly gliding just above rooftop height (there were other witnesses that night too). I think we're in very exciting times at the moment: the whole scene has really kicked off since 2017, good dialogues are taking place, some very heavy hitters - scientists - have gotten involved (Gary Nolan is my favourite). Theres more legitimacy being applied to the subject, and - for the most part - a great deal of the hokey youtube dubious video crap and new age channellers have been ushered into obscurity in the light of the subject being taking more seriously. And I see this awakening going on in other camps, too, such as the Bigfoot community, where stuff that was once ignored or not spoken about (because people didnt want the subject tarnished by talking about high strangeness in connection with encounters), the more woo-woo phenomena is now being discussed.
What it all has in common, is that we are really having to concede that our notions of consensus reality arent complete at all.

Tbh - and Im not going to hold back on this right here, I'm gonna come right out and say it: I loathe christianity - everything its done and a great deal about what it stands for. Getting into the occult has only served to finally confirm for me once and for all what I always felt about this. Our understanding of unseen worlds and the 'ecology' of beings that live alongside us has been strangled for 2000 years due to the oppression of the Abrahamic faiths, with imo christianity being by far the worst culprit. Judaism I can respect to some degree (and I hold my hands up and admit I know very little about the Muslim faith). But not christianity. I know a couple of occultists that had come from a heavily christian background, that have managed to reconcile these things, often by getting into the more mystical christian practices, but they are the exception. I reckon our species would be in Alpha Centauri by now if it werent for our knowledge being stunted by dogmas. But truth will out.

I left out the final climax of my experience, a strong vision that happened, I think it deserves being posted elsewhere. After this final event, unfortunately, my connection with this entity faded away rapidly. This really saddens me. On reflection, I may have gotten exactly what I needed at that time to move on from the heartbreak that was trying to heal, or I may have been regarded with some compassion because of it. I would love to know if what I encountered was some aspect of Lilith or some precursor to her, or whether it was 'just' some wandering succubus. I received SO much love and affection during this experience. Im sure everyone here can empathise with this: I know I will never, ever be able to experience such whole-hearted attention and pure love and arousal from any mere human woman. My experience with the American lady I had met was powerful enough already to be something very out of the ordinary, something I have nver found since. But the succubus experience went so much further than this, leaving it in the dust completely (thankfully!). Sometimes, I begin to suspect that so many things Ive experienced have been preparatory, building towards an outlook and awakening to allow something truly unique. We're all really lucky people, and (without wishing to have delusions of grandeur) somewhat pioneers. It must be the season for it.

Finally - I havnt been able to replicate this experience, at all. I dont mind admitting that Ive had to battle with a porn addiction since then (in the absence of any other fun occurring). I try to be the normal human I once was. I love women, but... I feel like Ive moved beyond being satisfied by what they can offer. Im not the same person I was when my experience happened: Id have trouble retracing my steps to recreate the experience or call back in the same way this being - Ive got to accept that, and start again from scratch. Im not far off being able to enlist an occultist in New Orleans to "matchmake" for me to find a spirit lover. Ive warred with the obvious arguments around paying for such services for ages, but I just want some progress now. Maybe we can find out if there has always been a being around me waiting to get my attention. Well she certainly did that! I think one of the most important things I did originally, was to abstain from all masturbation and build my energy up. In fact - Im reiki trained and I should know better - I know that such abuse of my own personal energy has actually encouraged many health problems I struggle with now because Ive been (ahem) depleting my energy field so regularly. Lesson learnt I hope. Weed dosnt help me, at all, either. As much as I love it, it clouds my senses and just makes me uncontrollably horny. I need to bring my body and energy back into natural balance without any additives at all.

Man, I feel like I've been conspicuously left out of the whole UFO phenomena. I mean, if it was going to happen for anyone, it should be me, right? I'm only a little jealous. I've got plenty of strange and interesting stuff happening around me without flying saucers looming overhead. (Not that I would complain if any want to stop by and say "Hi!") With that being said, I often get UFO-esque phenomena happening in my immediate vicinity. I get the multi-colored and shadowy auras, blindingly bright orbs that dance on the edges of my vision, and so on. I really shouldn't complain, but I still want to see one. I agree that there seems to be a lot of overlap between UFOs, big foot, and the succubus phenomena. My theory is that they're all denizens of different dimensions that are occasionally visible in our own.

I had a hate-boner for Christianity for a time. It's a normal reaction to being sold a placebo by snake oil salesmen. But then again, I try not to live like I've got a chip on my shoulder. I don't want Jesus or anyone else from the Yaweshian pantheon living rent-free in my head. (I'm borrowing a Gen Z internet colloquialism by using the phrase 'rent-free' and I believe it's very apt here.) I agree that we would likely be far further along our technology tree if the Christian dogma of celebrating ignorance hadn't taken root. The ancient Greeks and Romans had basically invented mechanical computers that could precisely track the movements of celestial bodies using differential gears - something we weren't able to do again until just after the renaissance. (Check out the Antikythera mechanism.)

Good luck to you, Essence. As you well know, I've been thoroughly reprogrammed to only want the intimacy of my succubus. There's nothing else quite like going to bed every night and feeling her there at my back, resting her hand on the side of my face, always ready to make love when I'm up for it. My only job is to stay healthy, keeping my energy and testosterone up.

Keep watching the skies dude, it'll probably happen when you least expect it. I havnt had any activity since... 2017 (oddly enough). Id say its because Ive moved to an urban area again, but the close encounter I mentioned happened in the middle of a busy suburb anyway so...?

Man - you have what I want (and was probably much stronger an intention when I had my experience): I want and am totally willing to commit 100%. That was my decision, and it'd probably do me good to get closer to it again.